Renewing Relationships On The Advice Of The King Of Cups

The Ostara 2014 Tarot Blog Hop

This blog post was written as my contribution to the Ostara 2014 Tarot Blog Hop.  Do click onto the following links to read the blog posts of my fellow Tarot bloggers.

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Our wrangler Joanne Sprott had been kind enough to get out of the usual clichéd theme of balance which was often expected in any write-up about the festival of Ostara.  Ostara was often associated with balance because it was a festival that marked the vernal equinox where day and night were equal in duration.  Instead, she had asked us to focus on the theme of renewal.  This was apt simply because many of my friends across the world had been suffering from a protracted winter, and some had also experienced severe winter storms, floods and torrential rains.  Ostara, was truly about renewal, especially when it welcomes the first glimpse of Spring.  

As I am a Roman Catholic, I was in the Lenten period preparing for the celebration of Easter.  During mass last Sunday, the priest, in his sermon asked the congregation, "In preparation for Easter, what aspects of your life needs renewing?"  That had set me thinking, and I believed it was the Universe' way of guiding me as I wrote this blog post.

Ostara And Easter

My Pagan friends around the world celebrated the festival of Ostara by honoring the Goddess Eostre. She was the Goddess of fertility, Spring and renewal. I had discovered through my research that there were many myths surrounding Eostre.  One of them was that she travelled throughout the lands with a white rabbit as a companion, to bring life to dying plants and they put coloured eggs all over the fields in the process.  Anglo- Saxons during the festival offered coloured eggs to her.  This brought me then to the topic of Easter and it explained to me why children all over the world celebrated Easter with painted eggs and chocolates, and were either gifted with an Easter bunny made out of chocolates or dressed themselves up as Easter bunnies at Easter parties.

Ostara fell on 21 March when I would be mid way through my Lenten celebrations.  My Catholic friends, family and I, had been preparing for the coming Easter celebrations in April.  In many ways, whatever the co-relation I had read about Ostara and Easter in the past without getting into an argument reserved for kindergarten kids about which festival came first,  Easter, like Ostara was also the celebration of renewal and rebirth when Jesus Christ rose from the dead.  As I had been shaped through experience to be  extremely opened about different religious and cultural beliefs, Ostara to me, came as an early Easter celebration for me.  Hey, you know me, I am up for anything that called for a celebration.

More importantly, this particular Tarot Blog Hop had a special meaning for me because in preparation for Easter, I was in the process of letting go and forgiving past hurts, making up for my own faults and failures, and moving on to reconnect with those who had crossed me and whom I had crossed too. 

The topic of this Ostara Tarot Blog Hop -  RENEWAL -  was timely.  

The King Of Cups Reversed

As Ostara or Easter celebrated renewal and rebirth, I picked a Tarot card to look at what aspect of my life needed renewing most.  The King of Cups Reversed showed up to gently remind me about not one but several aspects of my life that were governed by the King.

The King of Cups in Tarot was a figure of emotional maturity, compassionate and nurturing leadership, and the balance of  mind and heart. He was the epitome of quiet strength. Honestly, I could not identify with this King.  What a softee!  Astrologically, my Sun sign was that of the fiery Leo, which was represented by the energetic, passionate, bold and confident King of Wands.  Nothing stood in my way of getting what I wanted, and nothing scared me.

The reversed King of Cups represented one who had allowed one’s emotions to control  one’s  life or had been responding in a “knee-jerk” fashion to how others might perceive him or her. Sometimes, this reversed King might fall into extreme mood swings, causing everyone around him or her to be confused, not knowing when he or she might blow up into an emotional volcanic eruption.

Renewing Relationships This Spring

I turned the reversed King of Cups card around, and started meditating on the card image.  I heard a soft whisper from the King and the touch of his gentle hand as he spoke.  He asked one question, “ As you grow your spirituality and start living a heart-centred life, how will you  manage life with the same heart-centredness in your capacity as mother, wife, daughter, manager to your team at work, direct report to your boss at work and business owner of Sun Goddess Tarot?”

The path before me that was filled with so many sharp bends and perilous bumps suddenly became quite clear.  I had been truly acting like the reversed King of Cups  recently with the stress of juggling multiple commitments in my multiple roles in recent months.  At home, I was an Ogre about to be dragged for his annual bath.  I often came home exhausted after a long day of work and several Tarot reading appointments or events.  At work, I was often on edge and growled at everyone whenever a project hit a snag or the boss questioned my decisions.  

With Sun Goddess Tarot, I often worry excessively about managing the mounting pressures on my time because of the numerous business commitments to my clients, and my business partners. I have got workshops, events, private and group classes and readings lined up for the next two months which from time to time, put me in a reversed 2 of Pentacles situation because I had over-stretched myself due to my inability to say no.  I often thought that as Tarot reader, mentor, and teacher, I had to always be there for my clients and proteges no matter the circumstance because I felt obligated to offer them help and support with my intuitive gifts.  However, at times, the back to back appointments and my inability to find time to ground myself in between would put a severe drain on my energy.  When I felt that I could not give 100% to my role as a light worker, I would get terribly upset and my confidence  level would take a nose-dive.

Turning The Reversed King Of Cups Around

Acknowledging the issues at hand, I resolved to turn the reversed King around.  With the multiple demands on my time and energy by my family, my colleagues and my clients, the one thing that they looked to me for was to manage these demands with a balanced heart and mind.  

Years ago, when I found my calling as a Tarot reader, Numerologist and Astrologer,  I had been channelling my inner Sun Goddess to help, guide and support everyone around me with positivity and genuine heart-centredness.  How can I aim to deliver positivity and genuine heart-centredness without having a balanced heart and mind? 

So this Spring, I am committed to renewing my relationships with my husband, my son, my colleagues, my boss and my clients.   Like the King of Cups, I promised to hold their hands through each and every challenge they might face by spending time with them to listen to their daily issues with a compassionate heart, and provide them with the right advice without judgement.

I was grateful for that reminder by the King of Cups, to always lead a heart-centred life.

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About The Writer:

The writer of this blog post is a marketeer by trade, and a tarot card reader by accident. She was awarded a Certified Professional Tarot Reader qualification from the Tarot Certification Board of America (TCBA) and is also a certified numerologist.  She is currently running a Tarot consultancy based in Singapore called Sun Goddess Tarot,  which provides confidential intuitive readings combining the metaphysical disciplines of Tarot, Numerology and Astrology via face to face and emails as well as readings at corporate and private events and workshops.  A member of the American Tarot Association (ATA) and the Tarot Association of the British Isles (TABI), she is also a reader for the Free Tarot Network and mentors Tarot protégés on behalf of the American Tarot Association

Website: www.sungoddesstarot.com

Email:  Joanna@sungoddesstarot.com

Facebook:  www.facebook.com/SunGoddessTarot

Twitter: www.twitter.com/SunGoddessTarot

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The King of Cups from the Golden Tarot deck by Kat Black

The Workplace Relationship Spread

Managing Relationships With Colleagues At Work

In the first week of the New Year, I was inundated by Tarot reading appointments with the bulk of the questions heavily weighted on career and workplace relationships.  Questions range from “Should I look for a new job in the new year?”, “What’s my new boss like?”, “How will my role in this job pan out this year?” 

However, the most interesting question I got yesterday was, “What’s the outcome of my working relationship with a colleague in the New Year?”  It was interesting to me because my client sought advice from my Tarot cards in a bid to proactively find ways to improve her relationship with her colleague this New Year.

To me, interpersonal relationships between colleagues are hardest to manage.  A work environment is often made more challenging by differences in personalities, attitudes, goals and personal agendas amongst colleagues.  The relationship dynamics that govern day-to-day interactions may be even more volatile when they are driven by an undercurrent of misperceptions, prejudices and lack of trust and communication.

So I created a spread to help her through her situation and I call this, “The Workplace Relationship Spread”. Please don’t be mistaken.  This spread is not suitable for questions with regard to romantic relationships in the workplace.  When you use this spread, the intent has to be purely focused on work-related relationships between colleagues.

The Workplace Relationship Spread

1) How was my relationship with my colleague last year?

2) What factors, internal or external, influenced my relationship with him/her last year?

3)  How will my relationship with my colleague pan out this year?

4) What factors, internal or external, will influence my relationship with him/her this year?

5) What is he/she thinking about this relationship?

6) What can I do to help foster a better working relationship?

7) What would be the outcome of the relationship throughout the year?

8)  Advice

The Spread In Practice

For the purpose of explaining the interpretation of this spread without revealing the real names involved in this spread, my client shall be addressed as Brenda and her colleague shall be addressed as Corinne. For this spread, I used the Morgan Greer deck.

1) How was my relationship with my colleague last year? – Knight of Swords

The Knight of Swords is a manifestation of my client’s colleague, Corinne, who was newly hired into the team last year, to help manage a rather big and complex project.  She brought with her a lot of enthusiasm and ambition to get the project off the ground, and not allowing anything or anyone to stand in her way of progress.  She’s very assertive about how she wants the project to be run, sometimes to the point of cutting my client, Brenda, out of the whole discussion process.  Corinne is so determined to achieve her goals and targets with this project that she had unwittingly trampled on many colleagues along the way, including Brenda, creating a measure of gradually increasing tension between them throughout last year.

2) What factors, internal or external, influenced my relationship with him/her last year? – 4 of Swords Reversed

The 4 of Swords Reversed is an interesting card to pick for this question because I gleaned more than 1 insight with it.  When Corinne first joined the team, she was so enthusiastic about the project that she wanted to do everything all at once.  She wanted to take on every aspect of the project regardless of whether she had skills and expertise to manage it.   She wanted full control of how the project was to be run even when there were multiple interdependencies within the project that required the cross-functional expertise of several team members within the company.

At the same time, the 4 of Swords Reversed is also a reflection of the frustrations everyone in the team felt due to the delays and stagnation of some aspects of that project.  The project proved very difficult to get off the ground, and the tension between team members mounted.

3)  How will my relationship with my colleague pan out this year? – 7 of Swords Reversed

Both Brenda and Corinne are very strong-headed.  This year, their relationship might prove equally challenging as they aren’t prepared to steer the relationship in a new direction. There is a lot of mistrust between them, and they are trying to absolve themselves from responsibility for any negative outcomes that may emerge along the way as they work on that project together.  If this state of affairs isn’t arrested, the situation might end up ultimately with exasperation, blame, finger-pointing, and unnecessary politicking.

 4) What factors, internal or external, will influence my relationship with him/her this year? – The Moon

Every time I pick the Moon in a reading, it brings out the topic of Carl Jung’s “Shadow Self” which I wrote a blog post about in http://sungoddesstarot.blogspot.sg/2012/10/Samhain-Shadow.html?m=1 . The Moon represents our shadow selves, an aspect of us that we often try to hide in the closet, out of fear of the negative opinions of others perhaps.  So between Brenda and Corinne, the Moon represents a murky situation made even murkier by both their attempts to suppress their shadow selves, be it their lack of confidence, their lack of skill sets in certain areas of their work, or their fear of being judged.

With these fears, they will always consciously put up a wall between themselves and not allow the relationship to steer to a better place through mutual understanding, support and opened communication.

5) What is he/she thinking about this relationship? – The Devil

The Devil is a representation of Corinne and her fear in letting go.  She is obsessed about controlling the project and she wants to be seen as having the expertise to manage this project just because she was specially hired for it.  There are hidden forces of negativity influencing Corinne’s thoughts about the relationship and restricting her from being more openly communicative. Corinne’s shadow self is her lack of confidence and her fear of showing it.  She’s not completely sure she can achieve her targets for the project on her own, yet she daren’t ask for help.  For one, Corinne thought of Brenda as a team member with an army of support while she hadn’t and  that started her off with the project at a disadvantaged position anyway.  She thought Brenda’s experience over the years made her arrogant and uncooperative.  She felt Brenda wanted to assert her role over the project and claim ownership of it.  Corinne feared that by openly sharing too much information about the project with Brenda, the latter might use it to jeopardize Corinne’s position. As the saying goes, “What a web we weave!”

6) What can I do to help foster a better working relationship? – Page of Swords Reversed

When Brenda sought advice from me, she had a genuine desire to make things work this year.  I picked the Page of Swords Reversed which advised Brenda to walk the talk on her desire to help with the project, and don’t be too hasty to judge Corinne and her capabilities.  Brenda knew she was good at what she did and that she could play an invaluable part in shaping the success of the project.  Instead of standing aside as a spectator criticizing everything about the project and everything Corinne did for the project, perhaps Brenda could step up and proactively volunteer to help push the project forward. Yes, she should step up and truly work with Brenda together as a team, leveraging off each other’s strengths.

The card also advised Brenda to not make decisions hastily or not be too curt and say anything offensive without thinking. The relationship is tenuous and required a lot of sensitivity in managing it.  Any negative opinions expressed in haste, would be taken wrongly by Corinne.

7) What would be the outcome of the relationship throughout the year when I deploy efforts to help foster a closer working relationship? – 5 of Wands

The 5 of Wands is a reflection of the differences in opinions, attitudes, and approaches to the project that will add to the tension between both parties.   They are nothing an opened and honest discussion couldn’t solve.  If there is need to lock the both of them in a room to resolve their differences, then perhaps that should be something they should consider doing to move the relationship forward in a more productive manner.

8)  Advice - Temperance

Temperance is a great advice equally for Brenda as it is for Corinne.  It’s a card advising them to manage each other’s differences with patience and persistence.   Brenda needs to aim to bring some harmonious balance back into the relationship with Corinne and ensure that she manages her with a measure of calm and collected disposition.  Brenda needs to accept that the work environment now has a new team armed with their own unique expertise and tasked to run a new project.  She needs to adapt to that new situation, and find some synergies with the new team, and work together towards delivering the project goals successfully.

It Takes Two Hands To Clap

Like all relationships, interpersonal relationships between colleagues can get quite tricky.  Communicating openly and honestly with one another helps the day to day interaction at work, but more importantly, it’s okay to accept that trust takes time and trust needs to be earned.  And it’s necessary to give others a chance to earn that trust.

About The Writer:

The writer of this blog post is a marketeer by trade, and a tarot card reader by accident. She was awarded a Certified Professional Tarot Reader qualification from the Tarot Certification Board of America (TCBA) and was recently certified as a numerologist in Singapore. A member of the American Tarot Association (ATA) and the Tarot Association of the British Isles (TABI), she is also a reader for the Free Tarot Network and is a mentor for the ATA.   She can be contacted at www.facebook.com/SunGoddessTarot or www.sungoddesstarot.com