Sunday 10 November 2013

A Conversation With My Father-In-Law

My Father-In-Law

I never knew my late father-in-law, George.   I had only seen photographs of him.  In one of which, he was  looking all smiley next to my late  mother-in-law in a photograph taken when they went on a holiday in Belgium with a very young David then.

What I knew of my father-in-law was very little.  I heard snippets of him from David.  I understood that when he was alive, he used to take pride in the fact that people from near and far used to come by to his garden for a wee visit because he was quite the gardener.  I heard stories of how he would wash his hair in the kitchen sink with fairy liquid.  I almost fell off my chair when i heard about this rather "odd-ball" habit.  David also kept a box of his father's medals that the latter had earned from his efforts during the war.  David was very proud of this fact.

I Am Not A Medium

Knowing very little of him, I thought it was rather interesting that he chose to connect with me recently.  Now, here is where I get the shakes when I discuss my intuitive gifts.  I read Tarot cards and I can decode Numerology.. Period.  I learnt to do these over years.  I am not a psychic.  I am certainly not a medium.  I checked Wikipedia to find out what a Medium is.  Wikipedia described a medium as one gifted with the ability to connect with the dead.  While I am quite sensitive to the presence of anything paranormal, I do not consciously talk to them.  I had dreamt of talking to a couple of people who had passed on before but I do not as a rule, consciously make time to talk to the dead.  When I watched TV programs like The Haunting Of or Long Island Medium, i often thought that while they had a special gift, at the back of my head was an unwitting judgement that i had formed, that they were a little "woo-woo" crazy.

Connecting With George

In the last few days, I thought I sensed George's presence though.  I was not sure at first if it was George that I was sensing but I smelt an unmistakable smell of Old Spice aftershave mixed with tobacco smoke.  David did not smoke so there was no reason for that smell to be wafting around me.  The smell seemed to be lingering from just under my nose and David and Joel could not smell it.  I felt as if someone's face (stubble and all) hovered quite close to mine.  I also saw an older man's face in my mind's eye.  He was wearing glasses and he was peering up at me through his glasses.  His energy was reassuring, calm, and he was soft spoken and gentle.  I was not sure what he was trying to tell me. His reassurance seemed to gently pat me on the back to say that no matter what challenges I was facing sometimes, I had to keep my focus on what was important to me. Above all, I had to take care of David.  See?  It sounded "woo-woo" crazy to me already.

So I sought advice from a friend and a practising medium Olivia and asked her if what I was experiencing was bordering on what they called "mediumship".  She said that from some of the previous blog posts i had written detailing similar experiences of "connecting with people who had passed on",  it could be the beginnings of an ability which could be nurtured over time.   She had also advised me to use my Tarot cards as a tool to uncover the messages George was trying to tell me.  Good call, Olivia.  I was so glad I did just that.

I was always very confident in my Tarot readings.  The messages were always very clear when I read for my clients.  I always knew that my intuition would kick in at the right time as i formed a connection with my clients so that I could provide him or her with the messages needed to make the right choices that will help the client to move forward.   However, with this reading, I felt as if someone else was reading the cards for me.  It was surreal but it seemed as if someone else was  trying to reshape my interpretation of the cards before me.

Through my Tarot cards, here was what George had to say.

My Conversation With George

Knight of Wands reversed + King of Swords reversed

Me:  "Zowie!  All reversed cards.  George, these cards are telling me that David is filled with scattered thoughts and is pretty indecisive about his career directions. He should be stopped from making hasty business decisions. Correct?"

George:  "David is often frustrated by the constant need to manage your temper.  You are always prone to angry outbursts, and your daily communication with him is peppered by a lot of aggression and high expectations."

Knight of Cups + 7 of Cups reversed

Me:  *Now panicking a little* " This Knight is a messenger telling David that he is about to embark on a new creative venture but he is not sure where his best options lie and need to follow his heart to get to where his bliss is."

George: " David is extremely sentimental and intensely emotional. He desires a much deeper relationship with you filled with romance and perhaps the spontaneity of romance.  All he wants is to make you happy in every which way he can.  However, you are so busy with other things. You seem to be involved in so many other pursuits in a bid to find fulfilment when true fulfilment is really right in front of you, in the form of a husband who is utterly devoted to you."

Justice + Nine of Cups + Ace of Pentacles

Me: *Feeling like a lousy Tarot reader by now* "David will find a lot more fulfilment if I treated him more fairly and re-established a new perspective of our relationship to help us move forward to a better place."

George: " What you both could do with is an open and honest conversation about what each of you want out of each other.  This is a marriage.  You are both not room mates.  Establish where each of you stand in the relationship and affirm your love for each other.  Be fair to each other's needs.  The marriage needs a healthy dose of open communication to allow the relationship to deepen further and be more fulfilling for both of you.    With more opened communication, you both can look forward to a new beginning where you both will be able to manifests your goals together and maybe enjoy working together on projects jointly perhaps."

Me: " Interesting.  We both did think about combining forces using some of our respective talents as he had been getting increasingly bigger photography assignments. And that's just skimming the surface of all the things that we could do together because of our respective passions."

Devil reversed + 8 of Cups reversed + 3 of Swords

Me: " I give up.  What do these cards tell me?"

George: "Both of you need to recognise that each other do have faults  and be willing to accept changes and be more opened to new perspectives on your relationship.  You, especially know that you had been shackled by the bonds of your ambitions, trying to juggle the management of a high flying corporate career and build a business with your passions at the same time, leaving no room to reflect on what is more important to you in your life.  So when you get home, every little thing that David did which you considered annoying, would be framed in your mind as a big disappointment.  This then becomes a storm in a teacup, leading to your angry outbursts because you take your frustrations out on him.  You will need to learn to walk away from things that are not important, and focus on things that are."

6 of Wands + The World

Me: "We will have a successful retirement together, fuelled by a positive relationship as we walk our journey towards it."

George: "  Learn to appreciate each other.  Recognise each other's gifts, quirks, and positive traits.  Give positive feedback to each other as often as possible to assure each other.  David particularly, needs you to do this to help him regain his self confidence.  He needs to know that as a husband, he is always doing what is right as a husband and step-father.  He needs that assurance from you.  When you both surround each other with positive energy, you both will celebrate many more wedding anniversaries ahead of you.  And yes, as you walk towards your retirement together, you both will be retiring happy and successful not because of what you both have achieved financially but because you both have each other to turn your retirement into a fulfilling and even more productive stage of your life.


I still do not consider myself a medium.  Yes, I am extra sensitive, but I am not a medium.  I am not gifted as one.  However, I am extremely thankful to Olivia who opened my mind to using my Tarot cards to communicate with my father-in-law.

And more importantly, I need to thank my father-in-law.  George, I have never met you, but I can assure you that marrying David was a blessing.  That explained why I kept getting your message about taking care of him.   I can hear you say now, "Take care of my Davy boy.  He loves you very much."

About The Writer:

The writer of this blog post is a marketeer by trade, and a tarot card reader by accident. She was awarded a Certified Professional Tarot Reader qualification from the Tarot Certification Board of America (TCBA) and is also a certified numerologist.  She is currently running a Tarot consultancy based in Singapore called Sun Goddess Tarot,  which provides confidential intuitive readings combining the metaphysical disciplines of Tarot, Numerology and Astrology via face to face and emails as well as readings at corporate and private events and workshops.  A member of the American Tarot Association (ATA) and the Tarot Association of the British Isles (TABI), she is also a reader for the Free Tarot Network and mentors Tarot protégés on behalf of the American Tarot Association.


My father-in-law looked so handsome in his Blackwatch uniform

My parents-in-law and Davy boy on a holiday in Belgium


  1. What a special conversation you had with your father in law! I'm glad the Tarot reading idea was helpful :-) Yo be honest I also hesitate to call myself a medium, as at this point I'm not so much "conversing" with spirits like Long Island's more a clear sense of their presence, sometimes a clear sense of how they feel about things, and other times a sort of image-feeling that provides information (like about their death, etc). It's an interesting journey, to be sure. It's comforting to know that we can connect with them even though they aren't physically present. What was your husband's reaction? Xxoo

  2. It absolutely drove him to tears....and it did the same for me too:)